I’m not right

No one seems to be safe from my sense of humor, not even my own children. I think I’ve tormented them all since they were old enough to understand they were getting tormented. My favorite line was to ask them if their face hurt and tell them it was killing me when they answered “No”. They where 6 and 8 at the time. My youngest is now 28 and I still drop that one from time to time. The answer I get these days is “It wasn’t funny when I was 6 and it’s isn’t funny now”. It still me makes me laugh and lets be honest, that’s all that really matters.

Speaking of my youngest daughter, she was the victim of one of my best gags of all time. My wife and I had just picked up a new car, a Jeep Grand Cherokee, earlier that day. It had this little feature I had never had in a car before. There were volume controls on the back of the steering wheel for the radio which starting me thinking of a great practical joke.

My youngest daughter was around 13 years old at the time and had been dancing at her ballet studio all day. She hadn’t seen the car yet so I drove it to pick her up that evening. We started driving home and talking about how nice the vehicle was. I ask her “Do you want to see something cool?” I looked down and pointed at the radio which was showing the volume level of 10. I spoke in a deep commanding voice, directing it at the radio and said “Twelve!” at the same time I used the hidden volume controls on the back of the steering wheel to turn the volume up to 12. I told her it was a voice controlled radio. I then said “Ten!” while turning the volume down to ticks.

She thought that was the coolest thing she had ever seen. She bravely yelled “Twelve!” at the radio. I did nothing. She looked at me funny then yelled “Twelve!” again, and again I did nothing. I told her that it had to “learn” her voice. She needed to “train” it by continuing to talk to it so it could learn her voice.

We spend the next 15 minutes on the drive home with her yelling “Twelve!” into radio non stop. We finally made it home, me laughing uncontrollably. She asked why it wasn’t working for her and I told her “Maybe because I was really just using these volume controls on the back of the steering wheel.”

“I HATE YOU!”

Don’t think too ill of me, karma came calling. Like I said she is 28 and she still living at home. She’s definitely getting the last laugh.

~Rob